Transformation and Healing

China

China

China, an 11 year old cat and I are healing together. She was injured on July 21. We think she was attacked by a feral cat. Her left shoulder was dislocated. For the past three weeks we have been recuperating together.Yesterday I felt like I was being called to come to the woods; I stated to walk out to the forest on a weathered trail. I didn’t walk very far before I heard a meow. I turned around and saw that China was following me. This is the first day that she has been outside and  already she was going way beyond a safe zone. China is still limping and wouldn’t be able to fend off another predator in this condition. Naturally I turned around and we walked home together.

It is interesting that we have been recuperating together. China on three legs and I slowly building endurance after a medical crisis with respirator exasperation and other issues that caused a perfect storm. I have learned patience from China and I am still learning. Both of us need to pay attention and not go beyond our limits.  She had no business being out in the woods. Perhaps I too am pushing it. My goal is to walk out to see the old Boy Scout camp. It is here where a wild butterfly habitat exists now. I want to see what shape it is in. In the meantime, there is a butterfly story that follows.

My brother-in-law Jack wanted to show me something in the garden. Growing among tomato plants there was a milkweed plant; a large monarch caterpillar was munching away on milkweed leaves several days ago. Yesterday Jack again wanted to show me something.

Monarch in classic J shape

Monarch in classic J shape

A monarch caterpillar was hanging upside down on a tomato stalk. The creature was in the classic J shape that indicates that it is going into the pupa stage. This is where it splits its skeletal skin for the last time and changes into the next stage of its life cycle. The day was cloudy and rainy. The caterpillar didn’t transform itself. When I was taking a photo I accidentally bumped into the plant and the caterpillar balled itself up in a protective mode. I questioned, does the caterpillar need sun to warm its body in order to allow the caterpillar to have the energy to change? Later in the day, the heavy rains came. I hope it didn’t get dislodged from its hiding place among the tomato plants. It does have some protection from surrounding tomato leaves. For now I will observe development. There is no such thing as coincidence. All thee of us are changing, China, the caterpillar and I. Each of us is coming into new life after being injured, ill or simply transforming.

Be happy insectamonarca friends where ever you are.

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Death and dying thoughts

Do you know the mourning dove song? The bird says, “Oh, pray for me.” This is what the song sounds like to me. I recently heard that the mourning dove reminds us to pray for the dying.

A few years ago, after my husband passed on (July 4), I have been consciously practicing a meditation on death and dying now that I am a widow and live alone. I am a mixed bag of spirituality in combination with being raised Catholic. Each night when I retire,  I practice praying for a happy death. St. Joseph is the patron saint of a happy death. Before I fall asleep I set my intentions on this meditation and I say a little prayer, “Now I lay me down to sleep I pray my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. The meditation brings peace and acceptance. Why shouldn’t death be a happy experience? It is a blessing to be able to sink under a cosmic wave and just float.

I do not want to extend life by any artificial means such as resuscitation, operations, chemotherapy  or dialysis. I simply want to accept that each human dies, cell by cell, from the very moment we are born. I don’t believe in human suffering any more than I would let my dog and cats suffer an agonizing death. If I knew that I only had six months to live, I would want doctor prescribed suicide to help me leave the planet in a painless fashion as possible. I believe that being centered on ceremony is a means of bringing peace. I love to be within the sacred, be it ceremony on Earth or meditation.

I read an article about a ballot initiative that would give doctors legal permission to offer suicide assistance when a patient has only six months to live and has no hope for recovery. The measure is called the Death with Dignity Act. It will be on the Massachusetts ballot come November. I only wish it had been a reality when my husband was dying from cancer and only had six months to live. I will vote for this initiative. It most likely won’t benefit me in my life time but hopefully, it will give others the opportunity to make choices. This is where I draw the line and  follow my own truth. I am happy to be moving to Massachusetts where I can take a stand on this ballet initiative. Source: Catholic Free Press, July 27, 2012, pgs. 1-6. The article does not support the initiative.

Be happy insectamonarca friends where ever you are.

Notes from a Plant Discoverer

I know it sounds a little silly but I absolutely get intensely focused when I see new plant species living on the property that were not there before. I may have wished for a certain plant or tree such as an oak tree or solomon’s seal to suddenly surprise me in my own little woods. What a thrill it is to discover they found their way to my heart’s sanctuary.

Rainbow over Minong

Rainbow over Minong

Today I was doing morning ceremony to honor the Four Directions and entities I speak to in remembrance. While I was facing west and finished remembering my family including my deceased husband, my precious dog Tia and cats Dulce, Sombra and Baby; suddenly I saw Black Cohosh and wild Leeks in the forest patch behind their memory garden. Do the plants enjoy seeing my heart spill over in joy? I can’t help by think they do and I believe they love me too. All of creation loves us and wants us to remember that we are all related and connected to each other.

We have fast lost the ability to understand the language of the wind and winged friends. I listen to the robins when they bid goodnight to the day and wish I understood their language. I hear mankind once did understand their brothers and sisters who live in the animal kingdom. How did we become so disconnected? Even though I can’t understand the chirps I at least can say I feel an understanding that they are saying goodnight and giving their thanksgiving for a beautiful day and sunset.

Nighty night Insectamonarca friends where ever you are.

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